82. Pool Party

Dear London Fire Snake Scorpio,

It has been 5 days since I last wrote you an update. I am so very sluggish this morning. Partly because I have been working like a maniac and partly because I am on my period. Happy to report that the stretches and the morning sardines did their magic, and after 3 months of late period, this month I got my period a day early. Success.

We spoke on the 4th, it was Piggy’s birthday. I was tired. It feels like I have been tired forever, and I don’t remember when my head didn’t hurt last. Or when I slept properly. I am one of those people who need a longer time to wind down in bed — an hour at least. But I have been working like crazy to make up for all the sick days, and now to prep for the surgery.

So by the time I get into bed at 23:00, I settle into the second wind we night owls always have around midnight, and I can barely get myself to sleep between 1–2 am. Sometimes self-play helps. Most times, it takes forever because I am so damn tired and edgy.

But I suppose the surgery will fix that, lol. I will probably be sleeping most days for the first few weeks. So, as unsmart as it is (yes, sleep matters as a preparation to the surgery too — I am aware), I am using every moment I have to do the massive amount of work I am planning to accomplish before the surgery.

On the 5th, a day after Piggy’s BD, the kids went to his house. We were supposed to have Piggy’s BD pool party, but the weather wasn’t suitable for an outdoor party. With great relief, I spoke to the girls and got them to agree to have their BD parties together on the 14th.

Then on the 6th, I saw the weather forecast for the 14th, and it is supposed to be around 16 °C. Sure, a forecast for 10 days ahead might change again, but it’s not going to jump 15 degrees. So I was looking at the calendar and realized that 2 days ago, on a Sunday, it was a perfect 33°C, and the opportunist that I am, I decided to move the party.

It was a logistical challenge for sure. I am not sure how it works in the UK, though I suspect it is very close to what it is in Canada. People here tend to despise being invited to a party a day or two beforehand. In the warland, it’s very different. Living on the verge of life and death, people are more flexible, I suppose, and my tribe will never miss a celebration. It’s actually considered an insult to God not to rejoice in everything he created for humans, lol. And celebrating with someone is considered a good religious deed.

Anyhow, since when did decorum stop me? I started calling people. Piggy invited 5 people, Wolfy invited 6 people, per my instructions. I wanted it to be smaller this year. Last year, I invited both their whole classes. I called, apologized, explained the situation — the weather on the 14th, the surgery on the 19th.

I was very proud of myself for not saying “Sorry” once. I know it’s a Canadian trademark, but Canadians use sorry differently than I was taught, and I am actively eliminating that word from my life unless I actually did something wrong. I didn’t schedule the surgery, nor was I responsible for the sun’s movement to create the weather. I am an entrepreneur dealing with the situation. Instead, I asked simply: “Will you help me solve this?”

Only one person categorically said, “We have plans, sorry,” before I even told them the time. I thanked them and called the others. To tell you that they were not shocked? They were. But the beauty of breaking the rules with a candid reason is that people feel like they are my co-conspirators, and I genuinely felt everyone scrambling to adjust their schedules and change things.

By the end of the 6th, I was not happy with the turn on list. Only 2 people said they will bring their kids. It was time to pull the heavy guns out. As a member of the “four kids mom” club, I know people, lol. My friend in the city, the Water Dog Sagittarius, of whom we spoke before, is a father of 4 kids. His second son was invited to the party because he is one of Wolfy’s best friends.

Actually, there is a very funny story on this one here. Wolfy was a few months old when he met her for the first time. He wanted a girl badly after two sons, and she had silent reflux like all my girls. So she was always on my hands; she could not be put down flat because food would come up through her nose, and she breathed like Darth Vader.

He fell in love with Wolfy the moment he held her for the first time, and for the next 2 years, until his little girl was born, he had a very special connection to her. When the older kids teased her about liking his boy, she used to say that his son was her husband and another kid from her class was her boyfriend. And when once, when she was about 4, I asked her, “And that Water Dog Sagittarius? What is he?” — “Oh! He is my wife!”

Anyways… I called him and said I need his manpower as seat fillers, lol. We had a good laugh about it, but here we were +4. His oldest son is a friend of Stallion’s; his girl is a beautiful soul; and his youngest, a 4-year-old, is a cute toy everyone loves to care for, including my girls.

Another mama of 4 had 2 kids in each of my girls’ classes, and they happen to be good friends. So I called her, and she let me “borrow” another one of her kids. The rest actually showed up and RSVPed the morning of the party. Including mine, we ended up with 16 kids. Not a bad turn up.

I must say, as tedious as this all was, I thrive on challenging logistics like this. On the 5th, my boy had a graduation celebration and sing-along at school, so he came home after school. He opened the door and said, “Mom, the neighbour is doing our lawn!” — My amazing neighbour, the one who built up my front stairs and his wife helped out with Piggy when I was in the hospital, decided to do our lawn. God, I love Canada. I live around amazing people, truly humbled.

So the lawn was cared for before the BD. On the 6th, I cleaned and inflated the big pool and set it on the grass, and filled it up. I covered it to let the water heat up a little.

The party on the 7th was a success, I think, even though I wasn’t at my best. My period just started, and I had the period flu going on that I get on the first few days. I am also bizarrely becoming very bad at cooking on those days. I am not sure if it’s the taste buds that are off, the exhaustion or the lack of attention to details — but it’s completely true that as much as I am a maverick in the kitchen the rest of the time, I am a total disaster on those few days.

And so, I had a case of chips I bought — $13 for 30 units (Junk always costs so little, lol) that I spread into bowls. Got some lolly pops, and candy, and gummy worms, and that was about it. You don’t know me enough to understand how “poor” this table was. It didn’t look like it; the table was smartly set, with no empty spaces, but it wasn’t what I usually hold.

And then the guests arrived, kids started splashing, and I had two mothers join, so they kept an eye on them. The heat was excruciating. So I went inside and made the kids a smoothie with blueberries and maple butter. It was amazing, really. Not all the kids liked it, of course, but it was amazing.

30 minutes later, I baked the frozen pizzas. The kids didn’t eat much, and I didn’t expect them to. Usually, I order freshly baked from the shop and then have loads to freeze, but this time I bought the frozen ones. $12 a pack for 4 pizzas, I had 3 boxes and used only 1 for the party. Always good to have reserves.

Next, I made homemade “ice cream” from bananas and heated up the chocolate cake. But as I said, my hands are not mine when I am like this, so the ice cream was a total flop, lol. I made it 1,000 times before, but when it was more of a smoothie and had a bitter edge to it for some reason, I just shrugged it off. You can’t fight your own nature. I do my best.

The kids all had fun. Drago was obsessed with an exceptionally rude friend of Wolfy, who was all about telling people what a terrible time she was having and how awful the food was. When she locked the 4-year-old son of my friend on the top of the seesaw, I told her off and to get off the seesaw when she didn’t listen fast enough to my liking. His kids are close to me like my own, and I almost chopped that little 7-year-old’s head off (I was kind. Ish. I have that “don’t mess with the teacher” voice and stare. No children were harmed at the shooting of this film and all that).

She basically bullied everyone at the party, and Drago took it out on me by telling me about it. As the host and a 14-year-old, she froze every time that little demon said something rude. I told her that I didn’t care about the behaviour, and it took me a while to realize that Drago wasn’t complaining for me to stop it, but because she didn’t know how to react.

“Most people feel horrible once their horrible behaviour is reflected to them,” I told her. “So the next time she says the cake is disgusting, you stand tall, smile, calmly look her in the eye and say — you know this is very rude behaviour, right?” She didn’t, of course, she’s still learning how to draw her boundaries, but Drago definitely came down after that. As if, now, at least, understanding how to stand her ground without feeling helpless against the rudeness.

There were other highlights, of course. Wolfy cried several times because she is so anxious. I take responsibility for that. I am so explosive with the kids over small shit when I am spent that she freaks out about shit around her all the time: The pool will pop because it’s on the ground, the kids are splashing too high, the kids are being too loud. Sigh. I am determined to do better, and I spent most of the party telling her to let go and have fun.

The oldest son of my friend, Stallion, and I all played splashing games. I thoroughly enjoy the power of holding the hose and jetting it until they scream, lol. They did get me good a few times with the water balloons, though. I was dead tired, but it was fun. Piggy had a blast, too.

The result is a house that is a complete mess: the floors are full of leaves and whatnot from every time they got in to pee. The sink is overflowing, and the living room is still full of the gifts the girls opened and left when they went back to their dad for another day. I ignored all of it. I am too busy to care and have too much work to do right now. 10 days to the surgery.

But all in all, I think I rocked it. 
I hope I will meet you before your 50th birthday, my love. 
I have some amazing ideas for that party.
And.. for the afterparty, wink wink.

Made you smile, admit it.
Always yours,
Oxy. 
June 9, 2026

Help me find him: Have you seen this man?